Hope: day 9

So, apparently, I've been thinking about all of this a lot. In fact, I'm not sure my posts can keep up with my thoughts, since I often have more important things to do (like, you know, being a mommy). So I'm sorry if this ends up being another long, rambling post, or if it's incomplete and I don't end up finishing it for weeks.

Anyway, the conclusion I think I came to at the end of my last post was that I'd like to find and teach Hope in the context of horrible things happening in the world. And I think the best way to do that is to be part of a cause. It doesn't have to be a huge, global cause like Bono's, but I think it's easier to be part of a cause than to attempt to fix the world's ills all alone.

And so, now I'd just like to tell you some things I've heard and thought recently about giving to bigger causes (incidentally, I'm talking about giving money and other tangibles; not time -- which is an equally valuable thing, but just not my current point).

Several weeks ago, the morning show on the radio station I always listen to was talking about the story of a death row inmate whose last meal request was to give a pizza to a homeless man. The judge denied the request, and Ian Punett was discussing why. During the discussion, he suggested that listeners call a pizza place and pay for a pizza for a homeless shelter. He then organized things so that listeners could call a Papa John's in Nashville and order pizzas to be sent to a local homeless shelter. The next day, Ian talked to the owner of the Papa John's who said the shelter had more than enough pizzas and now actually has a credit with Papa John's to use in the future. Just a couple weeks ago, he organized the same thing for a local teen shelter. They had enough pizzas for each kid who came through the door to get their own, plus enough for the volunteers.

So long ago that I can't even remember when (maybe a year), another show on the same station was interviewing someone who heads up a non-profit organization that helps unemployed women prepare for job interviews and careers. The woman being interviewed was talking about the need for financial gifts for several different things, but one of the interviewers wanted to know if they had a need for "slightly used" business suits and shoes. The woman said "maybe" but the interviewer persisted. It sounded very clearly to me like she wanted a quick way to empty her closet while making herself feel like she was helping the world. It bothered me.

Now, my husband and I just gave a LARGE donation of junk to the Lupus Foundation. Basically, we cleaned the basement and our clothes closet and let someone else sort through it. But we were not under any delusion that our donation was going to be very meaningful to anyone. We didn't even do it for the tax write-off, we just wanted to get rid of junk.

Along the same lines: A few months ago, I started making a quilt for a friend's wedding. When I was almost done with the top, I realized it was the ugliest quilt ever created. Okay, not ugly, just scrappy. And I knew my friend wouldn't like it. I don't like it. So after a day of being mad at myself and feeling guilty for wasting so much time, I realized that there are programs out there for donating homemade quilts to people (mostly kids) around the world. I got really excited and realized that this could be "my thing." Not only would I be making blankets for kids who will really appreciate them, I would also be able to enjoy a hobby and practice new patterns and techniques. But somehow, that feels very much like emptying a closet. Sure, I'm giving to a cause, but I'm not sacrificing anything. In fact, the donation actually helps me -- possibly even more than it helps the people I'm helping. Where's the Hope in that?

Just to clarify: I do plan to make and donate quilts. I also plan to donate more junk to Lupus and Goodwill. But I don't want to feel that those things are "enough." I don't want to feel guilty for not doing more; I just want to Want to do more. I want to put even more Hope into the world than these simple and easy things. Even if all I do is to make the effort to order a pizza for a homeless shelter.